irises

irises are one of my favorite flowers- here are two of the three varieties we have in our yard

garden

The garden is flourishing with the warmer weather. Flowers flowers everywhere! Lots of peas. Eva has eaten enough unripe peas now and she is letting them ripen again. So many strawberries to look forward to as well. I pulled up the last of the spinach and chard last night as well as some last minute kale and a few beets who were trying to bolt. Something about planting too early and their timer is off? The second batch I planted seems fine although I am definitely keeping an eye on them as I did not expect the bolting from them. There are 5 tomato plants, a cucumber plant and a watermelon plant. The scarlet runner beans are also coming up nicely. I am crossing my fingers for sunflowers this year. So strange none of them made it last year. I ask you- what is a garden without sunflowers? I love them and continue to plant them every year in honor of my grandmother. They were a special flower bond between us. No eggplant or peppers this year. I am leaving them to the CSA. And I have so much chamomile and the poppies! Wow the poppies certainly do well for themselves. These reseeded themselves from last year when Eva dumped the whole packet in the garden. They are amazing. Our whole garden is made even more festive by the bees. Bees and garden spiders and so many wolf spiders with egg sacs! I would love to get a picture of them but they run by so quickly.



roses, chamomile and poppies, calla lillies

Eva in a new dress- hey where is that barrette?

all about flow

Again with the no flow. Geez what is it with today not flowing when I want it to. I am spending a good bit of time holding space for what is today and while I don't mind doing this I guess I had sort of hoped that flow would show up at some point. So I took Eva over to buy some summer clothes and we almost- almost- got out of there without any issues and then she saw the barrettes. It never fails at this place. They sell these really cute but poorly made barrettes for just $3.00- which I will admit is better than it used to be. They used to charge something like $5.00 and I know, I know I have made handmade crafts and knit dolls and baked cakes- I know these things take time and creativity and resources but it's like this- every time I brought one of those barrettes home they broke almost immediately and then Eva was sad and wanted me to fix them and they were never worn again because the little sparkle that made the heart was gone and so then it was me with super glue and the tiniest bits of glitter imaginable...

So I said no to the barrettes. I actually remember saying no to the barrettes before we even went inside which I go back and forth on. Set it up or wait and see? I can't decide sometimes so I just go with what comes to me. This time I set it up and I thought we were fine- she loved her clothes! It went well! But they keep those barrettes right there at the check out and you know it is a small business and all and I don't fault them, except of course I do. I want them to put the barrettes somewhere else- like with the shoes or socks or something and stop putting so much pressure on the buyer with the just-one-more or the it's-just-three-dollars. Enough already, you know?

So I said no and Eva was distraught and while I enjoyed chatting with the woman helping me and learning about her son getting his driver's permit and talking about what-will-we-do-when-they-leave-home (although to be honest that issue is creeping up on her a bit more quickly than me at this point) and how my mom had a garage sale on the day I left for college (true- or at least my mind believes it, I haven't confirmed this one for years...) I also wish we could have done a drive through or speedy delivery because the longer it took the more distraught Eva became and by the time we left she was sobbing and heaving and so so sad about those barrettes. Really not all of the barrettes, but the one. The really pretty one. That one.

So we got home and she was still very sad and crying and sitting with me and she started asking me if we could go tomorrow to get the barrette she wanted? Oh no. I'm not going there. Going there means hearing about when-will-we-go-get-the-barrette every half hour until we go. No. If I'm going to get the barrette it is going to be now or not at all.

Turns out it was now. I changed my mind. I know, I know. So many head shakes and gasps. Anywhichway you look at it the barrettes were bound to come up again. I am a big believer in changing my mind, following my heart, doing what feels good right now. And right now I had to admit Eva made a compelling case for going back and plunking down the three dollars for the prettiest little white barrette without glitter you can imagine. Yep. Without glitter really sold me. I wonder at the change in circumstances if I had lowered my resistance a bit while we were in the store and looked at the one she had wanted then rather than waiting. It's tricky though. Looking while I was in the store would have totally opened things up to buying the barrette while we were there even if there were sparkles, in front of the clerk, with Samuel tapping his toes. So I waited. I didn't plan on changing my mind. I don't always. But then sometimes I do.

OK and here's the good part. Or how about another good part. The flow. The flow shows up. Samuel- after hearing we were going back to buy the barrette- shook his head and told me that he was really working on just not caring if someone else does something really dumb. As far as he is concerned, if they want to do something dumb, let them. And I said, that sounds great- a really good way to hold onto your own peace. And he said, yes! I don't need to worry about what other people are doing as long as it doesn't have anything to do with me. What a gem! (Of course I am giggling thinking about our exchange. I asked him outright- do you think what I am doing is dumb? He smiled. It's not my business to say...)

All at once he witnesses flexibility and consideration (or reconsideration?). He sees me following my heart. And he finds that holding onto his own peace is more desirable than not. Talk about a flow- and I didn't even see it coming!

dragonfly

We have been out and about the last couple of days having a lovely time with friends after spending so many days at home while first one and then the other child had chicken pox. Thankfully both cases were very mild and the worst of it was staying home for too many days.

I was out in the garden checking out some new flowers and leaning down to smell them when I saw this guy, so striking against the leaves. Do I think of anything besides flowers and bugs? Well, of course- chicken pox and children and strawberries (our firsts are appearing in our patch in the back!) and yoga and now nia and salad and the meaning of life and synchronicity and unschooling and reading and creativity and hair detanglers and Moomins and which book to read next and writing and presence and trees and swinging and bike riding and knitting and...

And a lot about flowers and bugs.

peonies

When I was a kid I took care of the peony plants in the back yard- out in the way back, out past the garden, past the raspberries, near the lilacs and almost, but not quite, to the railroad tracks. We had three big peony bushes and a bunch of rhubarb near that. I loved clearing them out and making way for new growth. I am so happy to have peonies in my yard again.



After all these years I finally looked up why ants are always on peonies and was so excited to read the response. They like the nectar secreted by the peonies and may even be helping the peonies open up their dense buds into flowers. I love that! Maybe that is where all of those large ants are heading as they meander across the patio. Their activity has certainly increased as the peonies have been blooming!

from Eva