and zen some

Seems like I keep reading little bits of pithy wisdom lately and feeling irritated afterward because the bits seem incomplete somehow, but are being treated as the Truth. And then- predictably- I argue with myself over said wisdom and feel overwhelmed and either stay irritated or decide I am not doing something right or I would understand or relate to or embrace the *wisdom*. These arguments leave my head feeling so dense and tired that nowadays, I get ahead of myself and end up feeling dense and tired before the arguing and thinking can even begin.

A few nights ago, I was reading {very briefly} in one of my Zen books and was just about ready to put it down (too much pithy wisdom for one evening...) when I came upon this little bit of wisdom that seemed just right. And I've been rolling it around in my head, marveling at it's exactness and perfection ever sense.

The section I was reading (from Nothing Special, Living Zen by Charlotte Joko Beck) was- actually- talking about "tossing around fancy concepts". {Perfect!} Concepts like- "Everyone is doing their best," and "Everything is perfect as it is right now." Great concepts. But still- only concepts. Words. Thoughts. Not our actual experience, in this moment. Beck points out that often, we plaster these concepts, these words, right on top of our actual experience, without ever feeling what we are experiencing. And this can be a trap. This can be mistaken for understanding. Too much of this can be "a source of confusion, anxiety and depression."

I loved Beck's example of feeling hurt by someone else- how we might go ahead and explain their behavior and our own experience with a concept like, "Everyone is doing their best" and inadvertently skip the whole messy, painful part of feeling and being who we are in that moment. Skip our actual experience and overlay it with a concept instead. And mistake that for Truth.

The depth of understanding and clarity- not to mention the serenity and peace of mind?- that we are looking for (that I am looking for?), is so much easier to find if we don't try and stack yet another philosophical concept on top of what is actually happening. The next time you are feeling frustrated (or angry. or sad. or overwhelmed.) and a well-meaning person (or book. or guru. or quote.) gives you a bit of wisdom, skip the wisdom and let yourself feel frustrated. Afterward- my guess is- you will truly know, everyone really is doing their best. All of the time. Ta da. But don't take my word for it...