Eva's pink and purple balloons

*Eva's birthday checklist*

cake with sprinkles and unicorn decorations
orange sorbet
pink AND purple balloons
unicorn balloon
unicorn party hats!
unicorn drawings on wall (Eva is taking care of that one right now- drawing and cutting out unicorns to hang on wall!)
do you see a theme?

The presents are wrapped! I need to buy butter at the store, which really must have been on my mind because I even dreamed of going to the store and buying A LOT of butter! Then to cake baking. I leave the unicorn decorating to Eva and she has worked out the design. Oh right- then to Party City for the balloons.

Eva has also requested a treasure hunt for her presents but said we will do it a little later in the morning because she needs a little bit more sleep...

daffodils!

Of Shoelaces and Fossil Fuel

Today the kids and I spent some time at my friend Lisa's house doing some yard work for her- pruning roses, digging up feral dandelions, trimming back clematis...

Here's that daffodil picture I promised-

here's one or two

Eva took these-
Maxwell on my lap with knitting; Samuel inquiring for the camera or at the camera?

and so

The way this day went was rain and sun and hail and rain and sun and hail and rain and sun and wind and wind and wind. And I was inside and outside and inside and outside and patioside and outside and inside and inside and outside. A changeable day in which I raked out more leaves and uncovered more wood violets and more bleeding hearts popping up and more columbine. The first daffodil! Some hyacinths in the near future. And for the indoor time? Garage cleaning and organizing and toy moving and appreciating and cursing and storing and smiling and frowning and recycling and finishing with a jumbo jar of beads all over the floor (must have been the cursing) which I left there until the next time. And laundry and trash and dishes.

With the evening being spent in a cleared out mood with Eva on the computer and watching a puppet show with a lantern and shadows and putting on tattoos and gentle talk about her life and small cuts on her fingers and watching her design more tattoos on her little feet and proclaim that she will sell body art at the upcoming homeschooling market.

I wish I had a picture of our first daffodil out in the yard. I would put it right here. Tomorrow.

Today the rain interrupted our plans and we spent the day indoors. I am nearly finished with my sweater- or at least with the raglan shaping. I am still undecided about how exactly the sweater will be finished and am contemplating both a hood and a zipper. We shall see. I am staying very open with this sweater.

The kids are just now finding their flow. There is a tent in the living room and the stuffed animals have been brought out. I hear the definite sounds of a game in the background...Chicky and the new stuffed robot and ratty and rabbit and Chicky's Momma Chick or Momma Quack? all going in the tent, bringing lettuce and radishes and carrots to someone inside. Ahhh... now the birthday cake has been brought out. There is sure to be a party!

Nice to find a flow. Good way to end the day. No time in the garden but plenty of time to knit!



Eva's flower petal art (with a little apple for the head)- crocus and dandelion petals and stems.

partnership

This is great. Today Samuel and Eva were arguing about who could watch what on the TV. Samuel had chosen one thing and Eva had chosen another. They were arguing about what to watch as the third thing. Neither one of them would use the computer's DVD player (so that both of them could watch something different at the same time!) and both of them were refusing to watch shows that they themselves had picked out at the library earlier in the day. After about 15 minutes of negotiating and listening and getting nowhere I decided to try something a little different. During the negotiations I had been trying to lead both kids to a place that would benefit both of them, something that would benefit their partnership. At different points one or the other would move in that direction but then the stakes would be remembered- "Hey it is my turn!" or "But I don't like watching a show on the computer, remember?!

What I decided to do was get clear in my own mind that something would come up that would benefit both of them. My exact thoughts were- "What does the partnership want?" I was quiet with that for a second or two- things move quickly in mind-time. Once I was comfortable, I found exactly what to say to them- they could choose a show together or one of them could watch a show on the computer or one of them could come back outside with me (where I had been gardening before they brought me in for negotiations). As soon as I said it I realized they had been wanting me to choose who could have the TV and I didn't want to. I think this was one of the main reasons they weren't able to resolve the issue.

Pretty quickly everything shifted. Eva got up from the couch and said she wanted to go outside with me. Samuel sat down to watch the show he had wanted. Once outside, Eva started playing a game with trucks and rocks and pieces of wood. Within ten minutes Samuel was outside asking to play with her. We all stayed outside together, me gardening, Samuel and Eva playing with the trucks for over an hour and when I was ready to come in for something to eat they asked me to stay outside longer- to play- together! Hooray for partnership! I am happy to say that it has been smooth sailing for the rest of the evening as well. Imagine that?!

I have learned a great deal about partnership from my parenting coach Scott Noelle and from reading Riane Eisler and while I feel like I still have a long way to go in implementing partnership strategies in my life, it is to me one of the most important shifts to work on.



First spring Nettle on Sauvie Island today.