game play

I mentioned before that the kids and I have been enjoying playing Carcassonne together after receiving it for Christmas. Something has happened over the last month or so, though, that has made playing the game with all three of us not quite as enjoyable as it had been. Or maybe it's just that things change? and I liked it how it was? Who can say. Did I think we would always be able to play this game together. Peacefully? No. But did I think it would last a bit longer than a month? Yes. I thought for sure I had at least a few months of playing this game with the three of us before it's novelty wore off. And I have to say- it just isn't quite the same when I play with just one kid or the other. There is something about three that adds a bit more dimension to Carcassonne, although it most definitely can be played with two. Something about not {quite} enough variety. I'm not sure. I saw one of its expansion packs at the toy store the other day and am considering buying it to add some variety to the two-person game and a little more flair to the three-person game in the hopes of refocusing Samuel more on the game and less on what Eva is up to. (Aside- Eva has quite a bit more energy and a little less game-focus than Samuel. She is three years younger, after all. I am fine with her playing the game while standing on her head and simultaneously building with her unused figures. Samuel, however, is not. So there is quite a bit of negotiation that takes place around how each wants to play the game. Which sometimes is fine. And other times- I will be honest- is exhausting. Tonight is a case in point for exhausting. Although, to be fair, once the game was over, Samuel was smiling and telling me how happy he was to have continued to play. So that is something. Still, I am looking for ways to have less exhausting and more fine, if you know what I mean. Which might mean, eventually, focusing on playing more Carcassonne alone with Eva and other games alone (like Stratego and Dominion) with Samuel, at least for the time being. Path of Least Resistance, and all that.)

ants

It seems like the ant scouts have come out a little earlier this year-



At least someone enjoyed the tangerines.

snowy wood violets

We woke up to {a little bit of} snow this morning. I'm happy to say that the flowers who were blooming seem to be all set for a little surprise snowfall.

An amazing mushroom covered tree we saw on our way to lunch.

Zoo posing

We went to the zoo recently and Eva and I had some fun with the stone animal statues. She wanted to sit on each one and then some.

moomin valentine

We made Valentine cookies today with some of our heart {and bunny} shapes. We also got to use some Moomin cookie cutters (and a large pig!) that a friend of mine lent us. We especially enjoyed making the Snufkin shapes and made green frosting for his clothing! (Which sort of made everything look like springtime, something I think Snufkin would definitely approve of.)

and zen some

Seems like I keep reading little bits of pithy wisdom lately and feeling irritated afterward because the bits seem incomplete somehow, but are being treated as the Truth. And then- predictably- I argue with myself over said wisdom and feel overwhelmed and either stay irritated or decide I am not doing something right or I would understand or relate to or embrace the *wisdom*. These arguments leave my head feeling so dense and tired that nowadays, I get ahead of myself and end up feeling dense and tired before the arguing and thinking can even begin.

A few nights ago, I was reading {very briefly} in one of my Zen books and was just about ready to put it down (too much pithy wisdom for one evening...) when I came upon this little bit of wisdom that seemed just right. And I've been rolling it around in my head, marveling at it's exactness and perfection ever sense.

The section I was reading (from Nothing Special, Living Zen by Charlotte Joko Beck) was- actually- talking about "tossing around fancy concepts". {Perfect!} Concepts like- "Everyone is doing their best," and "Everything is perfect as it is right now." Great concepts. But still- only concepts. Words. Thoughts. Not our actual experience, in this moment. Beck points out that often, we plaster these concepts, these words, right on top of our actual experience, without ever feeling what we are experiencing. And this can be a trap. This can be mistaken for understanding. Too much of this can be "a source of confusion, anxiety and depression."

I loved Beck's example of feeling hurt by someone else- how we might go ahead and explain their behavior and our own experience with a concept like, "Everyone is doing their best" and inadvertently skip the whole messy, painful part of feeling and being who we are in that moment. Skip our actual experience and overlay it with a concept instead. And mistake that for Truth.

The depth of understanding and clarity- not to mention the serenity and peace of mind?- that we are looking for (that I am looking for?), is so much easier to find if we don't try and stack yet another philosophical concept on top of what is actually happening. The next time you are feeling frustrated (or angry. or sad. or overwhelmed.) and a well-meaning person (or book. or guru. or quote.) gives you a bit of wisdom, skip the wisdom and let yourself feel frustrated. Afterward- my guess is- you will truly know, everyone really is doing their best. All of the time. Ta da. But don't take my word for it...